Individual Competitor Rating System (ICRS)

So who's the top competitor, and what determines that? We'll have to play the games out to find the true answer, but just like any major sporting event (this is a major sporting event) we like to analyze the game before it happens. Here is what matters in the Beer Olympics.

Tolerance: This is the amount of alcohol a player can consume without becoming incapacitated. The less beer it takes you to swing wildly, talk to walls, and sleep with ugly people, the lower you tolerance rating will be. Higher rankings will go to those who can stand and still participate, though no longer technically alive, over those who immediately pass out and fall asleep.

Boot Factor: Chance you will vomit. Why does this matter? If you puke, you can't be drinking. Here's a real life example:

"I was playing Survivor Taps and it was down to two people on my tribe vs. five on theirs. They decided to destroy us and went full boats. I got the first two down, leaving two for my teamate, and then I would swoop in for the final one. We were killing the other team, but unfortunately the two beers hurt me too bad and caused beer expulsion. I had all the time in the world to kill the final beer, but couldn't do it because of the spew.

"By the time I had control of myself the other team had caught up and we lost. Had I a boot factor of five, I would have been able to finish that final beer and we would have went on to glory."

Gross enough? Just be aware of how your team boot factor comes into play.

Chug Ability: Perhaps one of the most important facets of the Beer Olympics, this is how fast you can put a beer into your body through your mouth opening. This is different from chugability -- how fast something can be chugged. Ex: Bud Light, 5 Guiness, 10 Syrup 35.

Quarter Skills: Ability to bounce a quarter into a shotglass under intense emotional strain.

Pong Ability: Ability not to suck at Beer Pong. I'm a firm believer that there is a large amount of luck involved in Beer Pong, but if you consistently can hit a spot you are aiming for, you earn a high Pong rating.

Beer Die/Guy Rating: Ability to catch, throw and otherwise handle a die while still remembering to avoid biz and buzz and keep your beer at the proper fill level.

Flip Ability: Ability to flip a cup. These are pretty obvious at this point.

Intangibles: Maybe you bring something special to the table that no one else does. More than likely you don't but we can always make something up for this category and at the very least bring up a shameful story from your past.