ICRS: Baby Bird

Name: Baby Bird
Age: 25
Height: 5' 6"
Preferred Drink: Vodka Tonic
Training Grounds: Champaign
Overall ICRS: 3.25



Individual Competitive Score

Tolerance:
* *
There's a reason they call her Baby Bird, one drop of alcohol and she's completely gone. That doesn't mean that she can't go the whole night. She could pass out after one beer, could do so after twenty, but either way it's happening. She drinks Thelma and Loise style: 100 mph, blindfolded, and screaming toward the edge of a cliff. It's going to be messy, but you don't know when.

Boot Factor:
* * *
She's tagged her fair share of bathrooms in her day, but the real risk is the pass out. She often calmly lays down (passes out) in odd places citing, "I'm just feeling tired." Said places include my fraternity house kitchen next to a dead mouse, my mom's front lawn, the street, and a snow bank.

Chug Ability:
* * *
If you're mildy friendly with Baby Bird you know her mouth is always open and flowing with conversation, but can she reverse the flow and jam beer down that gullet? In her own mind she's the best chugger with female genatalia, and that confidence may be enough to crush the competition.

Quarter Skills:
* * *
Like an old lady at the flea market she can be easily distracted by coins with states she hasn't collected, "Ohh, Colorado!" Give her space and she'll one shot time and time again, but the moment she's in danger of being clinked she panics and crumbles.

Pong Ability:
* * *
She's a decent shot, but let's face it girls are at a natural disadvantage. If you aren't handling balls on a daily basis, you just don't have the practice that other competitors do.

Beer Die/Guy:
* * * *
Catch her sober and she's awful. Catching a die when you're shaking like Michael J. Fox is tough to do. Give her two beers and the soothing effects of alcohol give her border line man skills. She's messed with the best and come away with tales to tell. The big question: Who's her partner and how many of her beers can he drink?

Flip Ability:
* * * *
Believes she outchugged and outflipped Mayor McCheese boat racing in our garage (there's proof). With larger hands than most girls she has firm control of the cup and if that doesn't help, her intensity will. She's been known to bump losing male captains from the end of the taps line and psychs her team up with yelling, slaps, and punches. Her team is usually victorious although also bruised and emotionally broken.

Intangibles:
* * * *
Baby Bird can be a deadly pixie. One minute she'll be laughing and joking with you and next minute she'll kick you in the junk in front of a Pizza Magia, leaving you on the pavement coughing up blood and wishing for death. If you suck at life, she'll let you know instantly and keep reminding you. Like McCheese she can be easily distracted by busty women and cheese fries. As long as she avoids starting incidents that lead to her male teammates getting involved, and possibly getting stabbed, she will be a key competitor.