ICRS: McGee

Name: McGee
Age: 24
Height: 5' 3"
Preferred Drink: Miller Light
Training Grounds: Wild Wild West
Overall ICRS: 3.125





Individual Competitive Score

Tolerance:
* * * * (what she thinks she can drink) /
* * (what the officer's Breathalyzer says she can drink)
When you talk about McGee and use the word tolerance, it usually has something to do with how many beers she can drink before you want to duct tape her mouth shut or knock her unconscious. (By the way, if that was a category she would only be getting one star.) That being said, her drinking capabilities are pretty much on par for a female competitor.

Boot Factor:
* * * *
Despite only having an average tolerance, booting isn't usually an issue for McGee. We're expecting the "pass out" to be more of a threat come game time. The team captain may want to keep some No-Doze handy for the later rounds. If nothing else, it could prove to be a fun gag for some of the drunks.

Chug Ability:
* * *
While not as white and creamy as her drink of choice, McGee can quickly put down beer in small doses. Don't expect much out of her in a power chug, but look for her to make short work out of regular penalty drinks.

Quarter Skills:
* * *
McGee should start off strong in this event. Look for her to make some clutch setup passes in the early-going. After a few beers we expect she'll lose focus and start masturbating to Hunter Hillenmeyer, who she was mysteriously able to envision after five minutes of staring blankly at a bag of pretzels. (McCheese seems to have the same ability with Barbara Streisand)

Pong Ability:
* * *
To say that she has good days and bad days at this event would be an understatement. We've seen her run through ten cups effortlessly on a Friday, and then take shots that make the opposing team duck on the following Saturday. Speaking of which, is there a mendoza rule in Beer Pong?

Beer Die/Guy:
* *
For those of you that thought this entire paragraph would revolve around the always-popular "cleavage catch"... you were absolutely right. Thank God that McGee can't catch the die with her hands, because otherwise the cleavage catch rule would give her an unbelievable advantage over players with average bust sizes. Much like the Evolutionary-Foy theory, the entire rulebook of Beer Guy would have to be altered to address this critical flaw. For those that aren't quite clear on this, here's an image depicting McGee's cleavage catch advantage for all you visual learners: (see below.) My team may counter this by using McCheese, who has similarly-sized cleavage.












Flip Ability:
* * * *
Take the beer into your mouth, swallow, some quick wrist action, and repeat. Yep, this is definitely her best event. She'll make a solid female center piece on any team. And even though she not talented enough for the position, we recommend using her as the anchor so that both teams will have equal opportunity looking down her shirt.

Intangibles:
* * *
While McGee doesn't dominate in any one event, she does bring a solid all-around game to the table. A good team captain will coordinate some sort of Buddy System to help her avoid getting any DUIs on her way to the bathroom. We expect match-ups will play a key role here. Look for her to pitted head-to-head against Baby Bird, consistently distracting her with her goods. She may also upset some heavily-favored (no pun intended, McCheese) male competitors if the pressure is on.